A Christmas Present of Life..........

It has been a long 12 weeks.......and although I don't normally share really, really personal things here, simply because it just isn't good reading.....but more importantly.......who really wants to know "bad stuff". I am definitely a person that "goes inward" in the face of adversity, and this was no different......WELL.....this is just so big and has dictated my entire being for the last 12 weeks, that I just have to put it out there...especially at this very special time of year when we are all about being grateful.

I am a seven year breast cancer survivor.....you know, they say once you get past the first five years the rate of survival is good....not a "given", but really, really good. So you can imagine my surprise when my November breast MRI can back with an abnormal reading........I took a deep breath and scheduled the cat scan to determine what was going on......I had gotten through this once before and knew I could do it again if I had to......But then I got the report that, although the abnormal breast reading was nothing to be concerned about, there was, however, a lesion on my hip bone......DO WHAT??? I asked "is this bad"......he said "it could be"......but how can that happen? I'm seven years into this thing....wouldn't it have shown up before? "Not necessarily"......OK.....lots and lots of tears.......lots and lots and lots of fear........and finally a full body bone scan for the results I just knew would tell me I had bone cancer. I knew I just wasn't ready to let go and still had so very much I needed and wanted to do....I mean, my Tater is just four months old....how would she ever remember me if I was going to die.....and I felt certain that was my fate. That is what your mind does to you, you know. Well, I got the results yesterday and was told the 1/2" lesion had no malignant properties.......I then realized I had not taken a deep breath for at least ten weeks and was able to finally exhale.........and I also knew I had just received the absolute best Christmas present I would ever get.....

I got on with the "business at hand" and completed Kristi's wedding trunk and Tater's memory chest....I have planned my whole new year and am just so very excited to be here.....I can't wait to start on my "to do" list and conquer 2010.........Life is good :)

My daughter's wedding memory trunk finally got finished just in time for Christmas....it's amazing what you can complete when you think you might "run out of time"......

So, it goes without saying just how very, very fortunate I feel for the way my situation has turned out........I realize just how much I am loved.....how much I want to do....and how much I have to be grateful for. Here's hoping your Christmas is full of love, family, and all the things you hold dear........life is so very fragile, so love with all your heart......it's just not worth it any other way.

many, many blessings, jana